Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Receipt That Launched a Thousand Workouts




I never in a million years thought a 2pc fish and fries and a sweet tea from Capt. D’s would be a defining moment in my life. Up until now, I really hadn’t had any of those type moments, but boy was that about to change. Ok, let me back up. See, there’s this man at work (yeah, it’s always about a man) that I’ve been admiring from afar for a few months now. You know, the typical stuff, making small talk in the breakroom/hallways, walking past his office a few times a day to smell is cologne, mentally undressing him in my head, blowing up my computer so he’ll have to send someone over to fix it…just kidding on the last one, mentally undressing him in my head…errr, sorry, I got sidetracked. Anyway, back to Capt. D’s. Well, for those of you that know me, you know that I’m a sporadic dieter at best. I never seem to keep my motivation going for over a week at a time. I’ve been like this for a while now and the June 1 (the date on the receipt) wasn’t any different. I left work to go grab something to eat since as usual I didn’t bring anything from home. I decided on Capt. D’s since it was close. I go trudging inside and low and behold, who do I see standing in line? Yep, Mr. Hotness himself!!! Normally, this would have been a good thing, but it was hot outside so of course I was sweating and that would be the one farking day I didn’t’ wear any makeup so I was looking pretty much like a hot mess. I really wanted to turn around and leave but before I could, Mr. Hotness saw me and struck up a conversation. Mmmm, he smelled soooo good. I swear I don’t remember too much of what he said up until the point that he said “So, do you want to join me for lunch or are you getting yours to go?” Errrr….what!?!?!? LUNCH!! JUST THE TWO OF US!!! WOOOOHOOOOO!!! MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED! THE UNIVERSE IS SMILING ON ME!! TODAY I AM THE WINDSHIELD AND NOT THE BUG!!!..or so you would think. The next seconds will be forever etched into my brain. My response was, “Oh, I’d love to, but I really need to get back to the office. I’m just getting mine to go” What in the Sam Hill just happened? Who said that? Why did you just let a golden opportunity to get to know him better pass you by? You.are.a.RETARD!! Well the reason I did was “simply-complex”. The first thing I thought was “What if I can’t fit in the booth?” Yep, sad but true. My life had come to this. What's even sadder is that if you look at the receipt, you'll noticed that clearly I wasn't too devastated and digusted with myself to walk out of there with a 2 pc fish and fries dinner and a SWEET tea.

To be continued……

Leaving work and heading to the gym for workout number 37/1000.

1 comment:

  1. Holy Moly!! You can't leave us hanging??!! There are people with no lives (such as myself) who are not going to be able to sleep tonight while I figure out what the "continued" part is going to be!!

    Look, Missy! You get back here and finish the story! Pronto! I need my sleep...

    ReplyDelete